V. H. King's Ink

As a disabled artist, my art updates tend to be infrequent. One of the most important lessons I learned in 2020 was to listen to my body. As my health snowballed from precarious to complete disaster over the years, I knew I had to find a new way to make art in ways that were gentler on my body.

While I can still whip out sketches in an hour or so, the frequency with which I manage to do that isn’t what it was before. Completing a painting in three to five hours isn’t in the cards anymore. I’m more aware now of the mental strain art can be, especially when I’m pushing myself beyond what I have capacity for. It takes significant focus to be process, organize, and compose visual information.

The energy it takes to focus detracts from my paltry stamina for sitting up–so even when I have the mental clarity for artwork, I may not physically be up to it. I’m often caught between either my brain or my body being up for the task, but not both at the same time. On the occasions when I do manage an art session, I am always tempted to do as much as possible. So many ideas! So little time! What was that part about listening again?

Despite my anxiety, I’m not actually running out of time. Growing up, challenging yourself with a stretch goal was the way to build your confidence–and bulk up your college application. There was a lot of emphasis on figuring out how to do things that sounded impossible–and now, the impossible thing is to do nothing. In truth, I’m doing a lot of work by taking steps back to listen to myself instead of running my body into the ground.

Life isn’t all about accomplishments–which is a hard pill to swallow for someone who so often measured their worth by how much they could do. Once upon a time, I had dreams of extravagant commissions and an arsenal of art prints. I exhausted myself trying to market my work to an invisible audience. What kind of artist was I, if I didn’t have anything to show or sell?

I’m a person. I’m healing from a lifetime of hating myself for not being enough. I’m learning how to make mistakes and learn what I love. The hardest thing I can do right now is slow down, but it’s an invitation into new ways of thinking, feeling, knowing, hoping, and dreaming. And that’s what my art is to me–ways to do all those things, and hopefully create a few things along the way that help people connect with themselves and with others in beautiful ways.

I gravitate towards working with acrylic paint and watercolor pencils, experimenting with textures and contrasts. Most of the artwork I post on this site will be either that variety or pieces completed with various markers. Sharpies, brush pens, alcohol markers, Crayola–marker art tends to be more accessible than painting, and it still gives me plenty of room to explore motifs and expand my technique.

Beyond hanging things on a wall, I’ve designed a number of activity journals. Some are available for purchase, others are gifted by referral or request, and of course there are the ones that are still in my head. I have a feeling there will always be an assortment of ideas in all three categories, just like there will always be more art to do. I might venture back into art prints and other products one day, but for now I’m taking my time.